Spinster Kit


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11 August 2005

Several decades of feminism and it’s Play-The-Victim-Card mindset have left a lot of women unable to accept responsibility for things that happen to them. Or, in the case of marriage, things that fail to happen to them.

“He’s afraid of commitment,” is the usual line uttered by women whose boyfriend is sensible enough not to get suckered into tying the noose. I mean, tying the knot. Rarely will women consider they might not be worth marrying, that the high divorce rate (women file for divorce two to three times more often than men; who’s lacking commitment now, eh?) and anti-male bias in family law might play a factor in a man’s refusal to get on his knees and beg to be manacled to an ungrateful wife.

Some ladies, however, manage to understand the effects of the Marriage Strike, if not it’s reasons. They realise that feminism has achieved it’s aim of “freeing” women from the “slavery and oppression” of marriage, and so spinsterhood awaits. Bwhahahahaha!

So, in my infinite wisdom, I have decided to market a Spinster Kit for thirtysomething women when they finally realise that very few men are naive and masochistic enough to want to get married these days.

For just £495, here’s what you get in the Spinster Kit:

* Copy of “Bridget Jones’s Diary
* Complete DVD collection of “Sex & The City
* Easy-to-follow guide on how to put up shelves
* Single bed
* Subscription to The Soap Opera Channel
* Signed copy of Germaine Greer’s 1997 book “Urgh, men! Grrrr!
* Vibrator, plus lifetime supply of batteries
* 5,000 cats

posted by Duncan Idaho @ 7:03 PM
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At 2:25 PM, TestSubjectXP said…

lol! Oh man, “tying the noose,” that was great. Clever entry.

Ever since I was a small boy the “afraid of commitment” line got under my skin.

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At 11:00 PM, murmiko said…

“afraid of commitment” pleeeeesssse.
Women are the ones who are afraid as they are the ones who do over 70% of all divorces.
Single, free and loving it.

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At 1:12 AM, Anonymous said…

classic!
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