On the buses


17 June 2006


I was on the bus coming home from work yesterday when I had an encounter with a rather nasty example of the species Brittus Skankus.

She got on the bus whilst yapping on her mobile phone, annoyed at having to interrupt her conversation to pay the driver. She got a bit stroppy because the fare was a bit more than she expected.

She was in her mid-twenties, a bit over-weight, bleached blonde hair and too much make-up. Predictably there was a lot of flesh on display thanks to her wearing some stupid little tight top and shorts, although it’s hard to determine whether this was on account of the recent hot weather or whether she just normally dressed like that.

She sat in front of me. Both seats were empty and she sat on the aisle seat and dumped her bag on the window seat, something that really pisses me off. I see a lot of women do that (but never any men) just so no-one can sit next to them, even when it’s busy. They want their ‘personal space’ I guess, even if it means forcing other people to stand.

What really pissed me off was listening to her telephone call. She was whining about how “Steve’s fuckin’ car” was broken down, Steve being her fiancé, so I gathered from her very public call:

“Steve’s fuckin’ car is broken down again. So I’m ‘aving to get the stinking bus home. I’ve been at work all day and I’m ‘aving to get the bus! It’s fuckin’ stoopid. It stinks on this bus, it’s stinks of fuckin’ sweat an’ stuff.”

What really annoyed me (and probably most of the other passengers) was her comment about how the bus stank of sweat. Admittedly it was a bit whiffy, but it was from her! Everything was fine until the huffing and puffing skank monster clambered onto the bus with her body odour pouring from the pasty white flesh that spilled out from her tight clothes like sweaty dough. She reeked!

Furthermore, she swore a whole lot on the phone and at one point started arguing with the person, saying:

“You should ‘ave picked up. Can’t you pick me up on Monday?…Why not?…Oh for fucks sake, forget about that…you should pick me up…oh why fuckin’ not!”

Etc etc.

She eventually angrily hung up on the person, but not before saying:

“Your my dad for fucks sake, show me some respect, like!!”

Charming way to speak to your dad, eh?

Just as I was contemplating whether I could garotte this spluttering hippo with my tie and avoid prison by pleading flagrant provocation beyond human endurance, she thankfully got up and lumbered off the bus (pausing to argue with the driver because he refused to let her get off at the traffic lights instead of at the actual bus-stop a mere 50-feet beyond.) As she went, I glanced down to her lower back and, lo and behold, a tacky and horrible tramp stamp unsurprisingly lurked above her big fat bottom.

Yuk. And this is the sort of filth that no doubt whines and complains that there are no “good men” about.

I feel sorry for Steve.

posted by Duncan Idaho @ 11:51 AM

At 8:05 PM, Captain Zarmband said…

Funny how this image of females is never depicted in the media despite the fact that many of us encounter this kind of arrogant female loudmouth on a daily basis. This kind of female moron seems to be the norm these days not the exception, but because they are female no one ever challenges them about their awful behaviour. They just get away with it as society en mass turns a collective blind eye. And can anyone tell me why all working class young females seem to be constantly doing an Ali G impression?


At 11:43 PM, Anonymous said…

Holy crap, I can actually smell the B.O. from your description. What a ghastly human.

Icepick the Mad!


At 12:08 AM, Anonymous said…

“And this is the sort of filth that no doubt whines and complains that there are no ‘good men’ about.”

And unfortunately also the ‘sort of filth’ that will have four or five kids and leave the rest of us to pick up the tab such that we can’t afford our own. Emigrate. Do it now (but vote from overseas). This shit must end.


At 4:56 AM, darkbhudda said…

“I feel sorry for Steve.”

I don’t. It’s guys like Steve who let this behaviour go unchecked.


At 10:33 PM, Anonymous said…

“I don’t. It’s guys like Steve who let this behaviour go unchecked.”

exactly. wimps like that piss me off way more than those trashy bitches.


At 10:57 PM, Anonymous said…

Over here in The Colonies we call those AmeriSkanks, and yeah, most of them have the Tramp Stamp along with numerous other “I’m too stupid to have a mind of my own so I followed the herd and got all these incomprehensible tattoos” marks of the beast.

Worse than that, though, is the jelly roll of blubber they love to display above their too-low jeans *gags*


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