Beer bellies


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14 July 2006

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Beer gut bill tops four figures

The average British male spends £1,144 per year cultivating his beer gut, research shows.

What the flaming bumwipes is this?

Some pathetic article from the Dweebie Beeb that somehow concludes that men spend money in order to get pot bellies? Do they think we sit around going “Hmmmm, I’m looking a bit trim, I’d better eat more kebabs so I can be even fatter.”

I mean…for fucks sake!

The study basically looked into the spending habits of men with regards to buying drinks and snacks.

That was it.

It had nothing to do with weight, just how much guys spent on drinks and junk-food. The only mention of beer-bellies was that a third of men worried about getting one; that doesn’t mean the other two-thirds had one and were proud. Unbelievable!

The BBC are extra-uber-tossers for the way they present this article. Basically, some idiot saw the study, found that a lot of guys spend a reasonable amount (not even a lot really, 5% of take-home-pay) on drinks and take-aways; bear in mind drinks are rather pricey thanks to all the tax the government puts onto them. The idiot then thought; “Hey, let’s really have a dig at men. Let’s make it out that they’re spending a fortune on beer and snacks, and let’s imply – no, let’s make it clear – they’re stupidly trying to deliberately get fat!”

Allow me to present a conclusion that I found amongst the results:

Single men on average tend to spend more on booze – £25 – during the week than married or co-habiting men.

Men who are in a relationship but who don’t live with their partner spend an average of £23 per week, while married men say they spend just £15 on average.

So in other words, being single means you can go out and have more drinks and more nights out than those who are married and co-habiting, who have to go home after one pint in case “her indoors” gets mad.

Sounds like a good reason to stay single to me; more freedom, more money to spend on yourself. More beer too.

Also:

One in seven Londoners spent over £40 week a week on alcohol alone on average – with 2% admitting to spending at least £80 a week.

That doesn’t mean anything, given that the price of beer in pubs and clubs in London is so high you’d have a hard time getting drunk on anything less than the United State’s annual defence budget. Probably.

It’s a dumb article and not really worth my time ranting over, I know, but it just bothers me when it’s contrasted with articles about women’s obesity, which are always pitifully sympathetic, how women are poor victims, that they have to comfort eat, that it’s even men’s fault they’re fat! It’s never their fault. But if a study comes along to show that some of us men enjoy a drink and a kebab, maybe a bit too much, then suddenly it’s time to enter patronizing mode and conclude that us men are stupid pot-bellied losers who go out of our way to deliberately get fat.

Seriously, you would never get an article presenting statistics on how much women spend on sweets, chocolates and snacks that has the opening paragraph:

The average British female spends £1,144 a year cultivating her big fat arse, research shows.

posted by Duncan Idaho @ 9:32 PM
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At 11:09 PM, Anonymous said…

£1 144 over a year roughly equals £3 a day. Now assuming that the alcohol is of a reasonable standard (read price) or purchased at a public house, tavern, inn etc then surely it is just following the doctors orders of a drinking a pint of beer, or glass of wine a day. What’s the problem with that? After all the BBC wouldn’t want us to neglect our health would they…?

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At 4:40 PM, Captain Zarmband said…

What about boozy females and their alcohol/kabab/pizza induced fat arses. How much do they cost? About half the total amount will have been paid by the taxpayer in single mother benefits.

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At 7:46 PM, Anonymous said…

ummm, there is no evidence that links beer to beer bellies. For all the dumb cunts out there, beer has less calories than a 12oz soda, and is far more nutritious.

Aside from the swill like bud light, many breweries beers that are bottle conditioned (any renowned brewery) have more nutritional value than cow’s milk.

Beer is a natural laxative, hop compounds have a sedative effect and can also enhance the mood. Highly hopped beers such as IPAs can settle un upset stomach more effectively than some over the counter remedies.

Dark beers are loaded with antioxidants, and the beers I make have b-complex vitamins from the brewers yeast and I even add Vitamin C to increase shelf life.

Stupid dumb shits don’t know anything.

THose mixed drinks that dumb whores drink such as margaritas have around 500 calories a glass and are loaded with sugar and have basically NO nutritional value.

All societies lived off beer since it was nutritious and was safer to drink than the local water supply.

All the founding fathers of the US were brewers. Most civilizations areas of settlements revolved around barley planting areas.

Beer was invented by the sumerians thousands of years ago and has been a staple of man’s diet for millenia. In essence liquid bread.

what gives people beer bellies is lack of exercise and what they eat with the beer. If you were to replace the beer with soda, the bellied would be even bigger.

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At 4:30 PM, Anonymous said…

The BBC are a bunch of pro-feminist wankers. And I remember seeing that article on their stupid website. What a load of one sided shit. This is all too common in Western society these days, where women are constantly supported no matter how much they fuck up, and men are constantly attacked no matter how well they do. Fuck em.

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