28 July 2006
This article is kick-started by reference to modern women’s favourite topic of conversation; meaningless celebrity gossip. Basically, Brad Pitt dumped Jennifer Aniston without fathering kids with her, then got hitched to a younger woman and had a kid with her (although Pitt is twit for marrying Angelina Jolie; if he insisted on getting hitched he surely could have done far better than a twice-divorced single mother skank who is nowhere near as pretty as she likes to think.)
And whereas it is easy to dismiss this as a tale of Hollywood heartbreak, we see the same social trend all around us in Britain. Most women dumped by Mr Write Off are left with literally nothing but the memories.
These women, in the twilight of their fertility, who believed they had their lives sorted, are dumped with no partner and, crucially, no babies.
Oh boo-hoo, women are victims once again because us men aren’t marrying them and having kids with them.
Naughty men! Bad men! Go to your room.
Wasn’t marriage and motherhood demeaning and oppressive though? Women should be grateful us men are giving them the freedom to work full-time until they’re 65 and die childless spinsters.
Though the article does actually manage to correlate women’s increasing loneliness with feminism, predictably it places the blame on us men.
It is happening to well-educated, highly successful, post-feminist women who thought they could have it all when they wanted it; who postponed their families to enjoy the ‘me’ decade in their late 20s and early 30s. Families and commitment could wait. But they didn’t. Or at least he didn’t. Of course, men are mostly culpable for this trend. But women must shoulder some of the blame, too. As a society, we have loosened the obligations on both men and women to commit to one another permanently.
See? Post-feminist women put off family and parenthood yet for some fucking reason it’s us men who are “mostly culpable” when things don’t turn out as planned for the poor dears. We’re being told to accept most of the blame for women’s choices.
Nothing new here of course. It’s astounding how common it is to encounter women blaming men for feminism! So we’re responsible for “oppressing” women in the past and now we’re responsible for the predictable side-effects of their hate-movement known as feminism? For fucks sake girls, take some damn responsibility.
(She contradicts herself later when she says; “And who can blame men for taking advantage of a system women created?” Well, erm…you can blame them. And you do. Earlier in the article. Daft self-contradicting bint.)
Part of the problem, surely, is that feminism taught a generation of women that they did not need men and they did not need marriage. We enabled men to become commitment-phobes.
Wrong. Feminism enabled women to become hostile sluts who no sensible guy would want to be around except for a quick fuck. Most women chose to take this route under the stupid belief that us men will happily bypass young and pleasant women in their 20s to marry used-up women who are over 30. We don’t. Never have, never will.
Many men are not commitment-phobes either (shaming language alert!); you encounter a large number of men who would have liked to marry and had a family, but find it’s too risky and there just aren’t any women worth marrying in the West. On many anti-feminist forums and blogs there are plenty who are considering moving overseas, uprooting completely just in the hope of finding a woman to have children with. It’s not us that’s the problem, or commitment, it’s women and the anti-male bias in the Divorce Courts. However, to women and the government, that conclusion must be avoided at all costs.
Men are happy to commit. We commit to stuff all the time; hobbies, jobs, friends. This blog itself is something I’m committed too. However, we only like to commit to things and people we like, and few post-feminist Western Women are very likable. The irony is that, as women become more angry and more slutty, the only guys who really want anything to do with them are the players and thugs, who, of course, are the least likely to marry them.
An increasing number of men who think nothing of robbing a woman of the best child-rearing years of her life.
What an astonishing entitlement syndrome modern women seem to have. Apparantly, if us men don’t have children with women, we’re “robbing” them, which implies that us men are under some sort of obligation to marry these women and have families with them. What bollocks.
For starters, it is women who rob themselves of their child-rearing years. Most women I know who are getting broody and wanting marriage are past 27, so their biological clocks have started ticking, and in any case most are more interested in bagging a sucker to support them and let them retire from their jobs rather than starting a family. I know plenty of working girls in their early 20s, their “best child-rearing years” who say they don’t want kids, at least “not yet”, and will leave it until their 30s; when its too late.
Furthermore, here’s a big newsflash for women;
Us men are not obliged to marry you and have children with you.
Sorry to break it to you girls, but there you go. The plain truth. So many women go around convinced that the world, and men specifically, owe her marriage and motherhood. Not so. Maybe the law will change in the future to force men to marry women – the law already forces us to support children we may not agreed to have had. We’re forced by law to support ex-wives, even ones who ditched us! So don’t bet on there never being a law that forces us to marry the increasingly desperate women of the West in their miserable glory.
Young women with careers would go nuts if they were told they’re selfish for not marrying a guy and doing his cooking and ironing, yet when these same women are older and looking to bag a hubby, they’re quite happy to tell us men that we’re selfish for not marrying a woman and providing for her.
If a guy does promise his girlfriend he’ll marry her and they’ll have kids some day, and breaks the promise, then I agree he’s a bit of a shit and his girlfriend can’t be blamed for being angry. But most guys don’t promise any such thing. For most women it’s all in their head. In fact many guys make it clear they don’t want marriage and children, or at least say they’re not sure, yet women just assume he will do at some point. At the very least “I can change him!” Run through some of the comments at the Daily Mail’s article and you’ll find some woman saying how she practically bullied her husband to marry her and, even though he didn’t want children, she “forced” him to have a kid with her; now she has the nerve to complain her husband’s heart isn’t in the marriage! Well duh! Yet women seem to do this all the time. I always hear them at work talking about how they’re trying to bully and shame their boyfriends into proposing. A marriage won’t work if only 50% of the couple are keen on marriage, but that doesn’t bother women; after all, come the divorce, she’ll be the one invariably better off. In this article the writer makes it clear men can walk away from a relationship more easily if there’s no children involved. True. Most women know this, hence their tendency to accidentally on purpose forget to take the pill should their boyfriend show no signs of proposing.
More women are realising that things are terribly wrong between them and men, and that more women are growing old and childless. This article, and a few others like this one from 1999, do manage to link this state of affairs with feminism, yet they still try and blame it on men anyway. They just can’t shake off the all-men-are-bastards mindset that feminism put there. Furthermore, they act like feminism was something that just happened in the 1960s, changed things then went away. It didn’t go away. It’s still around, being preached and ranted in lecture halls and across the internet, and still influencing public policies and laws.
Until women start taking responsibility for their own decisions, and until feminism and its effects are removed, women are just going to get even more lonely and have even less chances of ever having a husband and children. And fewer men are going to give a shit.
posted by Duncan Idaho @ 5:26 PM
At 6:08 PM, Dante said…
From what I remember, Pitt was whining about how Aniston did NOT want to have kids. That was why they broke up in the first place. She was interested in her own career over a family. He tried for years to start a family but she was unwilling.
So he was trapped in his own worst nightmare. A childless marriage/family. So he went with a women who had no problem with it.
Talk about feminist spin.
At 7:27 PM, Captain Zarmband said…
Men like me are not commitment phobes I just don’t want to marry a woman who will divorce on a whim and screw me over for all my money. I also do not want a woman who’s slept with half the country. Unfortunately this is all that’s on offer these days and so men stay single. Women….you have made these choices so you must live with the consequences. If you don’t like it then grow up and stop behaving like tarts.
At 8:07 PM, Nat said…
Men are not obliged to marry and have children but it is morally wrong to let a woman think that there is chances that it will happen if there are not. When a man meets a woman, if he clearly let her know that he plans to remain single all his life and never have children, then she cannot blame him for being childless and unmarried if she continue to date him.
At 8:35 PM, Dennis Mangan said…
Say it, brother!
At 9:29 PM, nevo said…
Here’s a new law in USA. to protect all mail-brides
Apparently the feminazis do not want men seeking brides abroad because they consider it sexual exploitation. What about consenting adults? Has this principle been banish by the femminazis? Will men succumb to the Vixens?
Ostracize men at your own peril. You’ll be sad old hags in your old age.
At 11:01 PM, Playboy said…
This ‘nat’ post is full of it.
My GF didn’t declare the day I met her, “I will only date you if you promise to marry me someday in the future.” Women never announce up-front that they are not interested in a guy – “unless I get a legal contract to half your money.” It is women who have a clandestine plan to one day in the future trick, cajole, or coerce a man into marrying her. Guys just want girlfriends and women initially hide their ulterior motives (ie, marriage).
At 11:33 PM, I just said…
Great writing, you really have a knack for drawing out the humor in your blog.
Its true that women today could blame anything on men, whoever it was caused by.
At 12:13 AM, Anonymous said…
It’s amazing how arrogant and self obsessed women are. When you come across a woman spewing the usual poison. Counter that with some truths. Watch how angry they get at the truth and fly into a rage.
I just wonder if women have always been so insane or is this something new to the world. This behavior does not seem to serve any purpose other than to drive rational men away from them.
At 10:33 AM, FredXblog said…
An enjoyable read Duncan !!
Yes- no matter how many times feminism comes back to haunt women, you can rest assured that it will be men who is at fault
I honestly can’t blame any man who refuses to settle down with a woman
Even men who are unaware of the true extent of feminism are clocking on to the fact that marriage is just not worth it
But feminists will never blame themselves for this state of affairs
It’s always our fault you see
At 1:19 PM, Anonymous said…
I grew up with a feminazi mother who taught (? infected ?) all of her children with women’s liberation. I hear the whining constantly from women that men will not commit. I always laugh. It always seems to be said by a woman when a man will not commit to her. They never seem to make the jump that they are the problem.
This is a great example of a central difference between men and women. Men are taught to admit to mistakes, to take sole responsibility for their actions, and learn from their errors. Women are taught to diffuse the blame to pretty much everyone else but themselves. By never “owning up” to their personal responsibilities, they don’t actually learn anything. If a problem is societies, or your boyfriend’s, or your bosses fault, then you don’t have to say that you made an error in judgment.
Errors in judgment are one of the major classes taught in the school of hard knocks. Women who have been to the school of hard knocks make better wives. Men know this. I wonder if women will figure this out.
At 6:07 PM, Bat said…
Women define commitment as the willingness to get married. Men define it as the willingness to stay married. By that measure, it is women who won’t commit. 2/3 of all divorces are initiated by women.
I also find it entertaining that most of the whining is coming from women who were married, had a husband, and dumped him. Then they get their feelings hurt when men see right through their “commitment” bullshit.
At 11:20 AM, Anonymous said…
To expand on what Nevo said, I went out on the Web and researched the IMBRA, and the feminists proposing it explicitly wanted to force American men to marry American women, by outlawing (thru regulations), any foreign brides.
The American male population is now overly exposed to the message that it is acceptable to desire and actually marry women “unspoiled” by American materialism and most troubling, “uninfected” by American feminism.
So the idea that men will be forced to marry women has taken a large step towards implementation (at least in America).
At 1:40 AM, Anonymous said…
“I always hear them at work talking about how they’re trying to bully and shame their boyfriends into proposing. A marriage won’t work if only 50% of the couple are keen on marriage, but that doesn’t bother women; after all, come the divorce, she’ll be the one invariably better off.”
Fucking EX-ACTLY! I can’t tell you how many times I have seen this myself and how many men have ignored the advice that putting the ring she’s nagging you about so much on her finger will increase rather than stop the nagging.
With marriage being so oppressing for women, why in the hell does it seem like I’m pledging my life to allow someone else to live in whatever luxury I can afford (regardless of how they treat me from then onwards) and why in the hell do THEY NAG US to get frickin married?!
I still think the feminist counter to the marriage strike is the man tax, which will result in a – strike -. So feminism should be countered now rather than later.
At 2:15 PM, NYMOM said…
Don’t complain then when women go ahead and have children without you via artificial insemination, single parent adoption and the like.
I noticed many posts where you attack single mothers even if they are working and able to support their kids alone…men have to accept that they are going to be very peripheral to family life with these attitudes you are exhibiting. Whereas women have shown they are quite willing to have children without your participation…
That’s the main problem with men today. You are all morphing into nothing but spoilers. As you don’t want to marry and have kids, yet then do everything you can to stop women from doing it either…
Do what you wish with your own lives; but then get the hell out of the way and stop getting laws passed so women can’t do what we wish to do with ours…
At 3:06 PM, Anonymous said…
“With marriage being so oppressing for women, why in the hell does it seem like I’m pledging my life to allow someone else to live in whatever luxury I can afford (regardless of how they treat me from then onwards) and why in the hell do THEY NAG US to get frickin married?!”
“Honey, you know I love you don’t you? It’s just that I don’t think it would be fair for me to marry you. I don’t want to oppress you. Marriage is oppression for women. Can’t we just be ‘friends’?”
friend (n.) 1. fuck buddy.
At 9:56 PM, Davout said…
Nymom, every man is entitled to immunity from being screwed over by women in every aspect of life.
Any law that elevates women above men, in any way, shape or form, will be neutralized sooner or later.
“Whereas women have shown they are quite willing to have children without your participation…”
Last time I checked, you cannot have children without our ‘participation’. Sperm is the sovereign property of a man, even when it is in a womans body. Deal with it. You cannot ‘have’ a child via single parent adoption and artificial insemination means men control the supply and women are the demand. Guess who pulls the strings then, hon?
Every single woman who is stupid enough to choose to have children through the methods above should have to pay for her own maternity leave and should never be eligible for welfare. The probability is much higher that she will inadequately parent her kids. The result(s) of her half-ass effort is manifest in the dregs of society: thugs, delinquents and misfits of all sorts,a fact that is abundantly evident nowadays.
Consequently, such single mothers should be held criminally liable for willfully contributing to societal decay. Perhaps they should be made to pay proportionately more taxes for the trouble they beget….
At 9:39 PM, CheekyMonkey1973 said…
“She was interested in her own career over a family. He tried for years to start a family but she was unwilling.”
I think the funniest thing about that statement is the idea that Jennifer Aniston has a career worth pursuing ;P .
At 2:28 AM, Maryellen Again said…
I find it so totally amusing that men are complaining about the way women represent themselves. If women in the UK are all a bunch of tarts, who are they tarting with?
I think perhaps UK women may be smarter than their counterparts in the USA. Here, we work at full-time careers, have children, keep house, educate our children as best we can, try to raise them to NOT be goops, and hide from our parents the husbands who won’t keep jobs, or who put their friends and their hobbies before the family they said they wanted. Here, men are just as likely to trick women into an unplanned pregnancy or a guilt-induced marriage as the other way around. I admit I was not quick on the uptake, I was taken in not once, but twice, by men who begged me to marry them and have their children. One I escaped from, and the second, I am still ridding myself of.
And no, he hasn’t any material thing I want, nor need.
Victim? I think not. Committed to being single again for a good long time whilst I raise two good men BY MYSELF? Yes.
I feel badly for decent men who will never meet a decent lady. What a waste of potential for a nice life.
That said, I still believe. Perhaps my sons will be able to meet ladies one day, and I can live vicariously through their experiences.
At 10:16 PM, Davout said…
“I think perhaps UK women may be smarter than their counterparts in the USA.”
Men cherish complementarity in women, not competitivity. We don’t give a rats testicle whether you think you can do something ‘as well as a man can do it’ because, in reality, without some form of assistance FROM MEN, you can’t.