Work/life balance


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31 December 2006

‘Excess work was damaging my health’

I thought this article would be the usual crap about work/life balance, in other words about women complaining about not spending time with their families because the poor dears had to work (you know, something they didn’t have to do when us men “oppressed” them by providing for the ungrateful fuckers.)

Instead it’s about a couple, Dan and his girlfriend Sam, who decided to get the funds together to emigrate.

But while Sam gave up her job to get ready for the move, Dan had to work a seven day week to prepare the financial cushion they would need for their new life.

For more than four months he worked every possible hour in his IT job and said his health, relationship and happiness were put under strain.

How typical, nay, predictable. She gave up her job just like that whilst he was left working virtually every waking hour.

This is what women generally mean by a work/life balance; hubby/boyfriend works, she has a life.

Furthermore his girlfriend was not even all that grateful.

“The hours he was working would vary from day to day, but he would not come home before 9-10pm at night.

..

“Things were not easy and I found myself getting angrier. I would find myself nagging him because he was at work, even though I knew he was doing it for a reason.”

So even though she knew that he had to work for a reason (and especially after she’d quit her job) she still snapped at him.

This is why us guys are in a lose-lose situation if we marry (or even just co-habit), regardless of whether there are plans to emigrate or not.

If you work as much as possible (and you often have to when the girlfriend/wife eagerly quits the job she probably hated – sorry, “sacrifices her career”) then you’re at fault for being a workaholic who is neglecting her. Expect to be divorced soon.

If you cut down on your hours, sacrificing some luxuries like holidays and a bigger house so you can spend more time with the wife, you’re failing to do your duty to provide. Expect to be divorced soon.

Obviously this goes for co-habiting guys now. Just like a woman with a husband, a woman with a live-in boyfriend can ditch the guy and get half his stuff and probably some nice big maintenance too.

This guy should have ditched his girlfriend and either cut back on his hours and stuffed the emigration dream, or worked hard to afford to emigrate by himself, and maybe grab himself a foreign wife or just stay a merry bachelor abroad.

posted by Duncan Idaho @ 12:53 PM
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At 2:39 PM, unpleasant bitter git said…

Duncan Idaho said… This guy should have ditched his girlfriend and either cut back on his hours and stuffed the emigration dream, or worked hard to afford to emigrate by himself,

Exactly. Why did he need the girlfriend to emigrate when she wasn’t working? You don’t need to quit your job to research the country your going to.

The story reminded me of something that happened to a mate of mine years ago.

There were 4 of us sharing a house together. We had lots of parties and fun but there were the usual arguments as well. This mate left after a punch up and went back to his parents and got a loan off of them to get a small house of his own.

Soon as he got it his girlfriend moved in. Soon as she moved in she quit her job saying she was “stressed out” but would look for a new job after a months rest (and never did). And next, she just had to have 2 cats as well!

Now this guy was a one man, self employed property maintenance company. He got up at 6:00am, made his own lunch and didn’t get home till about 4:30pm after a pretty much a non-stop day of physical work. She’d be sitting there with her feet up watching telly when he got home and she would expect HIM to make her a cuppa after he put the kettle on!

She couldn’t contribute to the mortgage because she didn’t have a job. She never bought any groceries or paid any of the bills because she didn’t have a job. She’d only cook meals three times a week because she said she was “not his slave”. He had to cook the remaining meals for both or take them out to a restaurant, usually as a foursome with another couple (her married friends).

After about 8 months he wised up and booted her out (along with her cats which he hated).

She then started sending him threats that if he didn’t take her back she’d get a lawyer and fleece him! That didn’t work because there were no cohabitation laws in the UK back then. She’d been watching too many American daytime TV shows obviously. After the “lawyer” threats didn’t work she tried the old “If you don’t take me back I’ll kill myself” shit. He didn’t buy that either.

She eventually got the message and moved on to find another poor sucker to leach off.

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At 6:17 PM, Bruce Wayne said…

Women are their own worst enemies. They create all these unreasonable expectations in their minds and then bitch and moan when things don’t go their way.

I always say women are in love with the idea of something but don’t want to accept the realities of it:

– they love the idea of marrying a doctor, but bitch when he works on call nights and long hours.

– they love the idea of having a slim sexy body but bitch when they have to avoid processed foods, lift weights, and do cardio to get results.

– they love the idea of having a large house but bitch that its too big to clean.

– they love the idea of driving a luxury SUV but bitch that their husbands are never home b/c he’s working his ass off so she can afford to drive it.

You get the picture.

The biggest problem with this mentality is that they BLAME THE MEN for not fulfilling their ridiculous expectations. Even in the the slim sexy body example I used, women will bitch and moan that men are shallow and only care about looks.

Every man has to understand that no matter what he does, the lengths he goes to, etc. for his woman, she will ALWAYS bitch about something.

Don’t try and satisfy that which can never be satiated!

Do what you want with women, just don’t ever commit to them.

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At 7:39 PM, Anonymous said…

It’s funny to me when guys brag about their girlfriend “letting” them play games or buy toys. She “lets” you spend your own money? Do you “let” her spend yours, or does she just do it? Men are so stupid it’s hilarious. Pussy power is truly amazing.

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At 8:16 PM, Anonymous said…

You said : ” or worked hard to afford to emigrate by himself, and maybe grab himself a foreign wife or just stay a merry bachelor abroad.”

Heh heh , my plan indeed. Your advice does not fall on deaf ears.
Outta here by spring 2007 !

Bon chance merry bitches !

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At 8:32 PM, Captain Zarmband said…

Yes I think we can all relate to experiences like these that you an “the unpleasant git” relate. The thing with women is that there are no correct answers just endless lists of demands that if the situation was reversed they would never dream of tolerating. Try asking your wife/girlfriend to support you while you toss it off at home. Try dating a woman who earns more than you do. It just will not happen because women are not attracted to men they are only attracted to the lifestyle that you can provide for her. There are few exceptions to this and women get more mercenary as each year passes. Men are wising up and remaining single in larger numbers and guess who’s moaning even more now that they’ve priced themselves into a solitary life forever. When it comes down to it modern women are lazy, selfish and care only for money. Lads do yourself a favour and stay single.

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At 8:35 PM, Anonymous said…

Huzzah, a story with a just ending (unpleasant bitter git). They are few and far between.

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At 9:54 PM, bob said…

somebody needs to start a TV show interviewing guys who’ve been through these type of experiences. and showing what their lives are like after they’ve wised up.

of course it would not get broadcast, but it could be put up on youtube or other internet distribution. there are plenty of options if you’re not looking to make money on the deal.

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At 12:24 AM, Anonymous said…

Fifty years ago, men often moved away simply to find work in a factory. The women didn’t complain. That was life. Now a poor bastard has to work a few extra hours and his bitch is ready to leave him or have an affair.

This news item is the clearest example of how women have become un-fricking-reasonable in their expectations.

These days, even Superman couldn’t please a woman.

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At 6:44 AM, Anonymous said…

The story of Xanthippe tells us that women have nagged their husbands as long as civilization has existed.

What is different this time is that the legal system sides exclusively with them – no matter how ludicrous and unrealistic their claims.

A man can usually handle a nagging woman. What he cannot handle is her hysterical behavior when backed up by the full power of the state. To that, any rational man must simply say “no.”

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At 10:19 AM, Paul Parmenter said…

It’s just as I have been saying for years. A man can break his back to do 99 things for a woman, and all she will ever do is complain because he hasn’t done the 100th.

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At 1:54 PM, dimestein said…

Anonymous 6:44 AM said… “A man can usually handle a nagging woman. What he cannot handle is her hysterical behavior when backed up by the full power of the state. To that, any rational man must simply say “no.”

What a brilliant statement anonymous!

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At 3:22 AM, Anonymous said…

The guys an IDIOT!!! What more can I say? If and when she divorces him, I wont shed a tear.
Stally

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At 12:54 AM, Nikki said…

Guys, why do you make such bad choices from the start? If you chose with your head instead of going for the girl that looks the hottest, you would realise that it’s not “all women” that mess you up. Not all men are bastards, either. Please don’t generalise.

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