Libby Purves article


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31 May 2007

Oh, the garden looks lovely, darling

PDF

This article from Libby Purves (one of the few female columnists in the UK who doesn’t hate men) concerns marriage, and how being nice to each other is a good way for spouses to remain together. In fact she rightly spends a lot of the article denouncing modern women for their often spiteful and ungrateful attitudes towards their husbands – and men in general – and entitlement complexes.

[W]ho could argue when Ebbutt says that there is an art in being married, and that you should not “exhaust your artistic power in getting married” but put some effort into staying that way.

This view has faded a little in the age of modern companionate marriage and rising female expectations. It sometimes seems, reading and observing, as if the notion of deploying effort, cleverness, and determined goodwill inside marriage (or prolonged partnership) has atrophied as women got more confident and physical sexuality took centre stage. In advice, fiction and TV there is polarisation between those who advocate frilly, vampish absurdities to “keep passion alive” and those who think that equality means perpetual competition, and a tedious sexual politics that jealously counts who does every household chore and celebrates women who bitch about the deficiencies of the male. I lose count of the chick-lit novels celebrating the shallowest aspects of female nature – shoe addiction, silliness, shopaholic Gaye Gambol profligacy – while excoriating men for being irrational about football, or cars, or reluctance to “commit” (frankly, until the prenup becomes law I would be nervous of committing my lifetime’s earning power to a lot of the self-obsessed fictional airheads we women are supposed to love).

Even older-women’s fiction – and journalism – often wilfully ignores the emotional rights of the male. One new novel is about a woman so neurotic about being 50 – for God’s sake! – that she is vile to her long-suffering husband, splashes out on flash underwear, sleeps with a stranger and pays scant attention to her offspring. And we are supposed to identify with the silly cow! Other frequent discourse tackles the “problem” of a man retired or redundant, suddenly being at home all day under his wife’s feet in “her” domain. Never mind that he paid for most of the damn house, sweating in a boring office and commuting for 30 years. Never mind keeping passion alive; how about keeping simple friendliness alive?

The new commonplace of the higher-earning woman also needs a bit of work. Men need to learn that it is childish to flounce around claiming to be emasculated by earning less, and then run off with some woman lower down the earning chain just in order to be worshipped again. But women, frankly, often need lessons in being graceful and tactful about being main breadwinners. They are not always so. I am still haunted by a letter in The Guardian some years ago from a woman who was supporting her redundant husband while he wrote a book, and said that she felt aggrieved and didn’t like him expressing opinions at dinner parties because her earnings had paid for the newspapers that enabled him to have the opinions in the first place. I am sorry to say that the reply to this was not “Curl up in shame, you unloving materialist bitch!”, which would probably have been my approach.

This may be why I am not an agony aunt.

posted by Duncan Idaho @ 5:17 PM

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At 6:29 PM, Tainted said…

I think I’m in love.

That’s all I’m looking for, not to be treated like shit. Not to be worshiped, not to be beheld in awe or to control or any of that other bullshit feminists love to say I want.

Just to be treated civilly and not be castigated cos I have testicles.

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At 6:43 PM, Captain Zarmband said…

I didn’t know that women like Libby still existed….perhaps there’s hope yet. Great article….well said.

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At 7:12 PM, Stephen said…

It’s like, I want to say ‘marry me, Libby’, but not yet.

Amen, tainted. Is it so hard to ask for just a little civility with the person we care so much about?

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At 7:56 PM, Masculist Man said…

Why would she use the word “redundent” to describe a male author? Perhaps he is pursuing his dream by writing. Women love to scream “equality” when it suits them as have been pointed out in the bold letters in the article. When the job opening is a CEO position women want to be “equals” but when the job opening is the front lines of a war then they want to be “women”. It seems they also want to be “women” when it concerns the “breadwinning” role.

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At 8:27 PM, Anonymous said…

hi, I’ve just recently found your blog and I really like it, its now top of my reading list, I remembered about an article I read a while back and thought it would interest you:

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sea/27449936.html

not sure if you would have seen it before as its been around the internet a bit, but its a good read.

J

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At 11:50 PM, Anonymous said…

I agree with tainted. All I look for is not to be treated like shit. I have been shat on twice so far.

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At 11:53 PM, Thunderchild said…

Yes – another of the new breed of “stealth” man-haters.

“Men need to learn that it is childish to flounce around claiming to be emasculated by earning less, and then run off with some woman lower down the earning chain just in order to be worshiped again”

The more it changes the more it stays the same !

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At 12:00 AM, dan said…

Libby sounds like another Kellymac, at least, in the making. One of the keys to our victory, gents, will be the women who side with us. Those who aren’t afraid to be called a “traitor” to their gender by the fembots. Like you said, tainted, all I want is to be respected and treated as an equal. Some South American, Eastern European, and Asian women still hold to that. Niceguy discovered that several years ago when he went to Japan. It’ll be kinda sad when his site retires, but he is in the process of building a wonderful life with his Japanese wife (Hurana I think her name is). All the best to him as he could not have had this kind of life with a spoiled, Americanized feminazi.

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At 2:39 AM, mfsob said…

I’m amazed the feminazi dominated government over there hasn’t had her killed.

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At 10:52 AM, Hmh said…

YES!! There is hope despite everything!

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At 2:07 PM, Jane said…

Look guys, there are women who love and respect their men.

Believe me , Libby Purves is not alone.
Love your man, treat him with respect..And you will be repaid a hundredfold..
It’s common sense really!.

Treat your man as you would like to be treated!

You can’t go wrong!

Very good post Duncan!

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At 5:38 PM, phoenix said…

You men are such fools. Most women think like that, or say they think like that. It’s still a good 60% or so, although they are less vocal. Still, there is no arguing the divorce statistics, and what happens in divorce. Don’t look at what women say, look at what they do. It’s nice that the really stupid ones make it obvious, but they are the minority. Most are smart enough to play the game at least until marriage.

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At 5:39 PM, Anonymous said…

My god Libby,
If women are now moaning about men not bringing home the bacon
why aren’t at least some of these men scribing as to how they have had to work when women wanted to stay at home.Not all partners are ceo’s you know.

We want what we want WHEN we want it and if we don’t want it then we are victims because we don’t know
whether we’d like it or not .

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At 9:48 PM, Eman said…

I second that! If I’m to be with a woman who is not a feminist ball-buster, enjoys my company, and want to have a love life, sex life, and a family on the side, then come to Daddy Eman! My hat goes to Ms. Libby for actually being a woman that cares about men…

…and to Duncan, your blog rocks! I appreciate everything that you are doing for enlightening a broken generation of men and boys in a feminist world! Keep up the good work…FOR A HOUSEBOY!

[First post BTW!]

P.s. I too have a blog myself:

http://forahouseboy.blogspot.com
feel free to visit it sometime!

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At 11:33 PM, Anonymous said…

Fuck Libby Purves, she still said a little fucked up shit.

When people say to me Why do I hate women I say what’s not to hate.

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At 1:57 AM, Anonymous said…

“Yes – another of the new breed of “stealth” man-haters.”

I agree with Thunderchild. Women never respect less successful or unsuccessful men; it is not in their nature to do so. All women want to marry their superior, even if they do not realize it, and will treat their less successful husband badly (even if it is in just a subtle manner).

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At 5:18 AM, Christopher in Oregon said…

No, Jane, there are NOT any women who love and respect “their ” men. Some of you simply use different methods of expressing your contempt for men. This is very common amongst conservative and/or Christian women.

If you put lipstick on a pig…..it’s still a pig. All women hate all men all of the time, and all women reserve their most venomous hatred for any man they are married to.

I have to chuckle when I hear women like yourself who claim to “love” men. Nonsense. You simply have refined your act. You hate men as surely as your lesbian sisters.

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At 5:26 AM, Christopher in Oregon said…

Fellows;

This is why we stand little chance of winning this battle against the Matriarchy. If a woman says something nice about men, then most men start salivating like a dog who is thrown a bone. Men get sooo excited to think that there might actually be women who love and support us. (Been there; done that)

BALLS!

You must wake up! If you think that there is a movement of women who are starting to support men, you had better pull your collective heads out of your posteriors. No such movement exists. The hatred that women feel towards men goes back to the beginning, and has only been institutionalized in recent years. We have all made the mistake of misunderstanding the intentions of seemingly friendly women.

Wise up.

I’ve been around more than most of you, and at 46, I can assure you that we have no friends among women.

Zip. Zilch. Nada.

The scariest women are the one’s who claim to love men, as they are often the most convincing liars. I’ve been burned by that type, so I know.

Trust no women, and never drop your guard. The woman who comes claiming to be your friend is the most dangerous of all. She might cause you to drop your guard.

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At 4:14 PM, phoenix said…

Christopher, we are of course in agreement on this. I personally care very little for an alleged men’s movement, I know it won’t work. I like reading these blogs because they’re at least entertaining and have truth in them, but a movement was never composed of only the truly intelligent and aware, a movement requires the stupid masses to follow the plan of the intelligent few. Here, we have all these morons that will instantly sell out as soon as even an average woman winks at them. I hate to use feminist shaming language, but quite honestly, I think a lot of the problem for much of those that portend to support the MRA movement is not so much against the misandrist laws, they are instead angry that they don’t have the capability of being a “player” and that they have been unsuccessful with women. That is how I see it when people are professing their love or marriage proposals for women that make these simple claims.

As I said in an earlier post, the majority of women are still intelligent enough not to openly mock their male counterpart during the courtship phases. They won’t start at least until after marriage. If these claims are good enough for you, then you should have absolutely zero problem with feminism because you’ve allegedly found a woman that claims these things.

The truth of the matter is these are empty claims. Again, you need to see how she acts not what she says. I think Christopher you mentioned tests, I don’t think they are full proof but at least it’s better than just believing what she says. I think it’s playing Russian roulette with your economic life to get married. I read this site and I’m reminded of that everyday. I’m thankful that these blogs exist for those of us that earn a significant amount of money to stay intelligent and aware, but we will never save anyone besides ourselves.

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At 7:21 PM, Anonymous said…

Guys, never get married. Just don’t. I’m single and intend to stay that way.A woman as a lifelong companion is complete bollocks in this day and age.I respect older and old women purely because they are from a different age and time(they are lovely people).Their formative years were full of values,decency and modesty. Unlike the shrill, moneygrabbing,self-obsessed and utterly selfish harpies that pass as young,modern women these days.Skanked up to the eyeballs, willing to drop their knickers for any bad boy – riddled with STD and, more often than not, utterly skint.

Why. oh why, for the love of God, do so many blokes fall for this shit? A quick fumble,maybe a shudder and a teaspoonful’s worth of spunk? Na, I’ll pass and remain blissfully happy. I’m surrounded with men at work who have bought into this rubbish and are paying for it quite literally.Stories of bitch wives going behind their backs, running off with younger guys, divorces which cost a bomb. One guy I work with is currently in a bed-sit.He’s 51. No money, no hope, no fucking life.The Bitch-Hag wife of his divorced him after 22 years marriage, taking fucking everything.House, car, savings in joint account.He lost all of that. I’d have cut her fucking throat for that, but that’s just me. Could prison and life sentence be any worse really? lol.

Remember, work hard. Save your money. Read good books. Buy good stuff. Play some games and just laugh at all the wombles,the sheep who have bought into this big old lie.And, please,you Brits, don’t watch Big-Brother. That’s for skanks and poofs. Take care.

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At 8:05 PM, Jolly Green Girl said…

Well well Duncan, nice article. I do agree with Libby.. there are a lot of silly twits out there who value shoes and marrying a rich man to be their ultimate goal (which I find intolerable) but there are women out there who are intelligent and are contributing members of society…and not a feminazi. They scare me too. 🙂

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At 9:08 PM, Christopher from Oregon said…

Phoenix;

I am unique in this area. Unlike most men, I have not been rejected by women, nor am I unable to get a date. I am a pure-blooded misogynist, bred by my parents from an early age to loathe women.

Having said that, I feel the need to say that I’m not violent, bi-polar, BPD or psychotic in any way. I’m not gay, bi-sexual, ugly, obese or any of the other shaming titles that women use to try and pigeon-hole any man who has the strength and wisdom to reject women.

I simply hate all things female.

Passionately.

I spent many years trying to convince men of the evil nature of women. I started preaching when I was a mere lad of twelve. It has taken until the last couple of years to awaken to the fact that my efforts were largely wasted. I would have been wiser to spend the precious, long hours counseling other guys doing something more constructive- like banging my head on the wall. Which is essentially what I have been doing.

Esther Vilar claims that men will never awaken from their dreamworld when it comes to women. When I first read her book, I had to pause at that statement. It offended me. After all, if what she said was true, then I had been a fool by trying to warn men. But, the thought kept nagging at me. Thanks to the internet, I have been able to amass a large number of books on the subject, from men’s rights groups, disgruntled dads, feminist “classics”, priceless books like “Sex-ploytation” and “The Predatory Female”, and dozens of others.

I have learned far more in the last several years than in my entire life before.

I have come to the following conclusion:

Only a tiny fraction of one-percent of the men in this country have the strength, wisdom or DESIRE to be free of the corrupting influence of women. As Shannon pointed out, SLAVERY IS THE NATURAL STATE OF MAN. I now realize that I was fighting against NATURE, and as such, I had no chance of succeeding. As the Preying Mantis destroys it’s mate after breeding, so a woman does the same to a man. To fight the inevitable is foolish, and in spite of my zeal and righteous indignation, I have been a fool for trying to warn men. Few wanted to hear what I had to say, and almost none ever took my advice.

The only advantage of my efforts have been the acquisition of knowledge for my own satisfaction. Granted; it will all disappear in the grave when I return to dust, but while I can make no impact on the natural order of things, and probably shouldn’t have even tried, at least I have gained wisdom in the time I have been here, and wisdom and intelligence are far more profitable than gold, as the Bible would say.

I have been asked many times to start a blog, and I have declined the invitation. I could fill it with countless articles of my own writing that would reflect my experiences and observations with women, but my efforts would be wasted. The vast majority of the men who read these articles are here because they either:

1) can’t get laid

2) can’t get a date

3) are recently divorced

or something similar. Virtually all men are slaves to their desires.

THEY WANT A WOMAN, and are furious when they can’t get one.

I do NOT WANT A WOMAN, and have never had a desire to sleep with one of the creatures. The tiny amount of sex I had when young (if you can call it that) was most unpleasant, and terribly smelly.

I am NOT a fan of spoiled fish.

I was trained from an early age to view sex as destructive and sinful, and only to be used for the creation of children. While this may seem extreme to some, imagine the amount of misery the world could be saved if most men viewed sex in this more conservative fashion, instead of viewing sex as an essential part of life. I am more moderate in my views of human sexuality these days, since abandoning Christianity, but still view sex with hostility. It is man’s one fatal weakness. (and it still smells like fish, I’m sure)

We can’t save men because men don’t want to be saved. They go marching blindly to their own doom, and no amount of warning will deter them from their path of self-destruction.

So, I frequently visit these blogs because I enjoy the material presented. The only one that I am sure will make it in life as a bachelor will be our resident Limey, Duncan, for he has crossed the threshold and has reached the calming age of thirty. When a man reaches that age, as my parents told me over and over, he “is home free”.

This may be a generalization, but it allows a man to clear the fog from his eyes, and view women in an entirely different light. The word “cellulite” takes on a new meaning, and you begin to appreciate just how dramatically a woman’s body deteriorates when she leaves her twenties.

Take care.

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At 12:21 AM, Tainted said…

Er, before we get ahead of ourselves, I was merely cheering for the concept of treating men civilly, instead of as shit.

I never said I heard the fell sound of wedding bells. It’ll take a miracle before that sound enters my mind.

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At 2:00 AM, Julesproves said…

@Christopher and Phoenix.

Well said.

It’s really disheartening to see how susceptible to female manipulation many men are. Some of these guys don’t even need to be in the presence of woman to lose it.

All it took here was some phoney “I sympathise with poor men” article to get juices flowing in this joint.

Strewth.

Weak, really weak.

Most of those guys have no interest in serious mens rights issues, it’s just about the pussy they CAN’T attract.

The real irony of it is, these same men attack a womans choice of man rather than the system of female privilege that gives women the latitude to write off most men as unworthy.

Which means they are not TRUE mens rights activists at all. They’re just horny losers angry at women, men and probably themselves.

Yesterday I told a friend of mine that his father would not be able to attract his mother today. The mother was clearly a very desirable in her younger days and could easily aspire to be one of these toxic trophy wives if she were younger.

When I told him this, he couldn’t deny it. He asked me why I said it. I explained that in todays society, there are no limits on womens sexual conduct.

Back then women had to think carefully about who they slept with for fear of unwanted pregnancy and the harsh consequences of a ruined reputation.

That is what must be brought back.

If we do not restore the constraints on women sexuality we will soon find ourselves back in a true Matriarchy where being the biggest baddest and meanest is the only way to get laid.

Attack the Bitch-stem – not the Victim.

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At 6:05 AM, Anonymous said…

I have to agree with the comments regarding the effects a few kind words from female posters had on many male posters to this blog. Women are not to be trusted (yes, all women) and any sane and lasting society keeps them on a short leash. As soon as women are taken off this lease of chastity and restricted rights, they will run hog wild, selling their pussies to the highest bidder, and refusing to have children and/or take care of them. Unless we return to The Patriarchy, Western society will collapse in a few hundred years.

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At 6:50 AM, Christopher in Oregon said…

Guys;

I have read some of the material by Kellymac, and other women who claim to support men, and one might be swayed by their words. This is a foolish mistake, and one I have been guilty of in the past.

Let’s assume for a moment that the average person reading this blog is at least nominally a Christian. I once was a fire-breathing fundy, so I know the Bible pretty well.

Let’s go to Genesis chapter 3, verse fifteen, and listen to what the Bible claims GOD has said:

“And I will put enmity between thee and the woman…..”

What’s that?

Enmity?

My trusty Webster’s defines enmity in the following words:

“Ill will on one side or both; HATRED; esp., mutual antagonism.”

It also refers you to the word “ENEMY”.

My, my. The Bible tells us that GOD himself put hatred between men and women.

BUT WAIT!

The Bible also frequently tells men they are commanded to LOVE their wives! (Wives are NOT commanded to reciprocate) Interesting. If men are not the one’s doing the hating, and the Bible says there will be hatred between husbands and wives, then just WHO is doing the hating?

Think now, boys.

Give up?

It’s the wives doing the hating. Simple logical deduction using the Bible as proof.

Now, the Bible itself tells men that they will be hated by their wives. Paul tells men they will have “trouble in the flesh”. Ecclesiastes tells men there are NO GOOD WOMEN. Proverbs is full of warnings about rotten women, as is Ecclesiastes. Early Catholic and Protestant leaders were very down on women, and that was true for almost the entire history of Christianity.

Could it be that men of previous generations were just a bit smarter than men today? Could it be that they understood the naturally corrupt nature of ALL WOMEN?

What men don’t understand is that we are often fooled by the different levels of rottenness in women. It’s all a matter of degree.
Some women are brazenly evil, while other women are more subtle. Women come in all sizes and shapes and personalities, but they all share one defining trait:

THEY ALL HATE MEN.

Just in varying intensities. But the hatred and contempt is real, and while not always in the open, it’s always bubbling just beneath the surface.

I have been beguiled by smiling women in the past who seemed to be genuinely nice people. But, as Shannon said, if you watch long enough, the true nature comes out in the end.

Few men are capable of understanding my words on this issue, and it took me a long time to fully understand the truth. In the back of the minds of almost all men, they have a degrading desire to copulate with one of these filthy monsters, and they hold out some hope that at least some women are not so bad after all.

This is a serious mistake. If you allow for the existence of even one “good woman”, you have let your guard down. Even Ecclesiastes chapter seven said:

“And I find more bitter than death the woman, whose heart is snares and nets, and her hands as bands: whoso pleaseth God shall escape from her; but the sinner shall be taken by her.

Behold, this have I found, saith the preacher, counting one by one, to find out the account:

Which my soul seeketh, but I find not: one man among a thousand have I found; BUT A WOMAN AMONG ALL THOSE HAVE I NOT FOUND.”

When I first present my arguments against women and marriage to Christian men, they are shocked that I could come to the conclusion that ALL women are evil, and that ALL women hate ALL men ALL of the time.

Then I crack open the Bible, and take them to the verses that back up my assertions. They are invariably stunned, and often they say something like “I never heard these verses being preached by any pastor….”

This is why Christian men should study ALL of the Bible, not just the touchy-feely stuff about Jesus loving the little children. I did, and it’s what drove me away from Christianity completely. I realized that Christianity was just another arm of the Matriarchy. But that’s another story.

In conclusion, just understand that there are NO exceptions among women. ALL women are your mortal enemies, and in time, will destroy you if given the chance through matrimony.

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At 6:58 AM, Christopher in Oregon said…

Julesproves;

It usually takes at least one trip through the divorce court for the average western man to begin to suspect that women aren’t really very nice after all. By then, he’s been broken emotionally and spiritually by his wife during marriage, and financially by his wife during the divorce process. At this point, he’s a mere shell of a man, and almost invariably seeks out a new master to marry and be enslaved by.

Up until a few months ago, even I held out hope that there might be a few decent women left. Long story short, the wife of a friend of mine proved to be a malicious bitch, rather than the decent woman I thought she was. I was truly stunned, as she was the greatest actress I have ever encountered.

Today, I give no woman the benefit of the doubt. I now realize that all women are evil, rotten and utterly devoid of any morality or ethics.

There are no exceptions.

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At 8:45 AM, Tainted said…

By the way, I note that a couple here are stooping to the feminist way of using shaming language (“Can’t get laid”, “Has been ditched” etc). I thought those were illogical arguments based on stupid assumptions because the attacker couldn’t think of any arguments more effective? Or because it is a way to pressure the targets into submitting to another viewpoint out of shame and/or guilt?

What, it’s okay to make bullshit assumptions about the sexual prowess of your victims when it suits you?

Next time, it might be wise to hold off the posturing until you confirm the meaning and intent of your target(s).

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At 2:06 PM, julesproves said…

Tainted said:

By the way, I note that a couple here are stooping to the feminist way of using shaming language (“Can’t get laid”, “Has been ditched” etc). I thought those were illogical arguments based on stupid assumptions because the attacker couldn’t think of any arguments more effective? Or because it is a way to pressure the targets into submitting to another viewpoint out of shame and/or guilt?

Ok – this is a fair point. But it’s hardly illogical to deduce that some one who normally rants against women and then does an immediate about face when he experiences some transient positive interaction with a female – is really only crying out for female attention.

I vow daily not to attack other men. I admit that I probably break this vow daily.

I’ve known all kinds of men to display what I call Pussy Begging behaviour. Thugs and players, as well as as PUAs and self declared “good man” types engage in it.

Pussy begging seems to be part of the male condition or CONDITIONING.

As a man who believes he has mostly overcome that conditioning I do find it nauseating when I see men attack each other over women -or when we go wobbly at the knees just because some random female deigns to show empathy for our experience.

That nausea sometimes results in a reflex attack on what I perceive as weakness.

However, that doesn’t mean what I said is not true, and granted, neither does it mean it is true.

So my apologies for that.

It’s not about women hating or pussy beggar hating, or hating whoever for me – it’s about restoring balance in the playing field between men and women.

We expose our vulnerability every time we lose it just because some woman was “nice” to us.

If a woman is nice, that’s just one woman. It’s thank you very much and have a nice day.

We still have a whole SIS-stem of anti-male law, anti-male social policy and an anti-male social environment to deal with.

We shouldn’t lose sight of that just because of the good feelings we experience from an instance of “positive” female attention.

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At 2:21 PM, Julesproves said…

Christopher said:

Today, I give no woman the benefit of the doubt. I now realize that all women are evil, rotten and utterly devoid of any morality or ethics.

There are no exceptions.

And that’s where some of us are at.

Each man must decide for himself how he copes with his experiences with women. That is a matter for him to decide.

But when we are talking more broadly about the MALE experience then I believe we must set aside any animosity we may harbour as a result of our personal experiences and focus on attacking the ways in which average men are disadvantaged socially, culturally and politically in SO-SIGH-ITY.

If we want to be taken seriously by other men, this the only way we will generate the support we need to effect change.

Anything less makes us vulnerable to being dismissed as misogynists by men and women both.

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At 2:47 PM, Jane said…

Christopher, you are a very bitter and sad man..
Unfortunately your parents have mistakenly advised you, to be on your guard with regards to women.

Look. I got married at 19 to a man I truly believed I would be with for the rest of my life. Unfortunately he was a gambler and a drinker. Something that I did not understand when I married him.
Don’t get me wrong , he was a very loving man and treated me very well.
Things went haywire when it was discovered that he was infertile.
Because I loved him, I could accept the situation…
But he broke my heart, and played around.. He could not cope with the fact that he would never be a father..
At the time I was very upset and felt so hurt and betrayed.
We parted, and 2 years later I met a wonderful man whom I married and had two children with.
He is a great guy, and I am truly blessed.
I have only ever had sex with two men.
Both were my husbands.

Don’t try and make out that all women are selfish uncaring sluts.

It is just not true!

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At 3:21 PM, Kathy said…

“Trust no woman and never drop your guard. The woman who comes claiming to be your friend is the most dangerous of all. She might cause you to drop your guard”

What utter piffle!

She may just think that you are a nice guy( person)

SHEESH! Your parents certainly have a lot to answer for Chris!

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At 5:07 PM, Captain Zarmband said…

I think some of the comments here are trying to put words in my mouth. I simply said that Libby’s article was a pleasant change from the usual man-hatred on offer from the mainstream media. Some people seem to have interpreted this to mean that I’m on the brink of getting married.

Calm down….I never said any such thing.

I regret to say that some of the shaming language and wild accusations on offer on this particular issue by some contributors leaves me cold. Some of the stuff I’ve read here (comments) are filled with bile worthy of the most bitter feminists. I do not need anyone to put words into my mouth, I’m quite capable of speaking for myself thanks very much.

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At 6:13 PM, Ald said…

Christopher:

Do you really think that being a slave to passion (hate in your case) is better, or at all different?

Perhaps people wouldn’t listen to you just as they would not listen to a fanatic of of any other ideology, a fanatic who is always on the lookout for anything that supports his point and is always dismissing everything that contradicts?

You can’t trust women
You can’t marry
There are no good women

What nonsense! With proper prudence, effort and willpower, you can win jackpot in a state lotter It is true, and I agree with it, that spending a lifetime and a fortune larger that the prize by a constant factor make the goal seem unworthy, but that is a different issue.

So, Christopher, would you answer the following two questions:

1. How much time did you spend reveling in your hate?
1. How much time did you spent thinking on how to increase the quality of women in general or find (or make, if none exist around) one woman of quality?

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At 8:42 PM, Christopher in Oregon said…

Tainted;

You need to consider the INTENT of the person accusing men of “not being able to get laid”.

Frequently, the accusation IS accurate, as many men want to get laid so badly, and for whatever reason, they are unable to do so. Usually this is due to women placing an inflated price on gaining access to their genitalia.

Now, think with me for a moment. When any product on the market has an artificially and unreasonably high price, one must consider the possibility that at least part of the reason for this lies with the consumer. The higher the demand, the higher the price. This is simple economics.

Men have allowed themselves to become addicted to sex, and in so doing, MEN have empowered women and sealed their own doom. Women are like used-car salesmen. They will charge an insane price for a crappy product, and won’t feel any guilt when it falls apart after leaving the lot (marriage).

So, while we can justifiably accuse women of every crime under the sun, in the final analysis, it is the MAN who submits himself to the control of the woman.

In this, I have nothing but contempt for the average man. I realize, though, that it’s only nature at work, and most men have little choice in whether or not they are going to be mindless drones for the Matriarchy.

Still, I find it disgusting, being a celibate and firmly in control of my passions. It sickens me to see men obsessed with sex, be they straight or gay. Such obsessions is unhealthy in every way, but then nature designed the average man to impregnate the woman, and once he has provided for her security, the man is then disposable. Such are the ways of nature.

So, if I take pot-shots at men for being frustrated at not being able to get laid, it’s not to try and shame men into marriage, but rather to awaken them to the possibility that just maybe if they take charge of their lust, the price women place on their vagina might drop back where it used to be. It’s still overpriced for rotten fish, but not as bad as in our present child-support/alimony inundated society.

I realize that men will always be slaves to their lust, and as such will almost always be ruined by women, but I’d like to see the damage minimized if possible.

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At 9:24 PM, BR said…

I agree with Tainted’s 8:45am post.

Drop the shame lingo, guys. I’m not impressed. So we’re “horny losers who can’t get a date?”

Fuck you. Get off your high horses (those of you who are saying these things, and putting on airs).

I’m never getting married, and no, I’m not taken in by a few kind words (it takes a lot more than that to convince me), but some of you are starting to sound like arrogant arses.

For hating feminists as much as you claim, some here are starting to sound an awful lot like them.

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At 5:24 AM, Anonymous said…

Good article but I don’t know about that last bit.

I’m not a huge fan of any man or woman leeching off someone else so they can “write a book”. Write a book on your own damn money.

Reminds me of that awful little man in the movie “sliding doors”.

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At 7:39 AM, Anonymous said…

Christopher in Oregon has some valid points but I disagree with him in some other points.

I agree that men’s activism is worthless because men are so eager for pussy. As my mother says “when you think with the small head, you can’t think with the big head”.

All the logic disappears when some beautiful woman smiles to us or treats us softly. Even me I have to put all my strength for not falling into the trap.

(I’m amazed that Christopher in Oregon has been able to control his sexual impulses and his need for love and sex. Please tell us how you do it. Only superior people know how to do that. Like Richard Mathieu – the happiest man in the world (scientifically proved) who haven’t had sexual relationships for the last 22 years)

However, I don’t think our men’s movement has no future. Activism is worthless (although the webs like this are useful). But this was logical.

Men are not good about activism. Men don’t like to complain all the time like women. Men are individualistic people and are difficult to join a movement. And yes, men are eager to be slaves of women.

But there is another way. A way more suitable to men’s nature. It is called the Marriage Strike. The good thing is that it works without the need of creating a movement.

If men refuse to marry (as increasing numbers), more women will begin to ask where is his Prince Charming. And some alarm will begin to ring (see, for example)

Don’t marry. It’s a trap for men. You can have love and sex without marrying and without compromising your assets. Why do you want to buy the cow, if you can have the milk for free? And if you buy the cow, the cow would be provide you with less and less milk and slave you.

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At 12:14 PM, Anonymous said…

phoenix said…

Christopher, we are of course in agreement on this. I personally care very little for an alleged men’s movement, I know it won’t work. I like reading these blogs because they’re at least entertaining and have truth in them, but a movement was never composed of only the truly intelligent and aware, a movement requires the stupid masses to follow the plan of the intelligent few. Here, we have all these morons that will instantly sell out as soon as even an average woman winks at them. I hate to use feminist shaming language, but quite honestly, I think a lot of the problem for much of those that portend to support the MRA movement is not so much against the misandrist laws, they are instead angry that they don’t have the capability of being a “player” and that they have been unsuccessful with women. That is how I see it when people are professing their love or marriage proposals for women that make these simple claims.

Whilst I respect the right to your opinion, I think you are being a bit harsh in putting down men who “can’t get laid”, or who have been unsuccessful with women.

Yes, I am one of those nice guys who can’t get laid and have had no success with women, but do you think I am only one out there??

I know many loyal,kind,hardworking decent men who cannot get dates or “laid”, as todays modern woman is only interested in the bad boys,thugs and players.

Also, if you read many of the posts by “chicago man” (author of the truth for men blog), you would realise that only about 10-20% of the men are sleeping with about 90% of the women, those men are mainly the bad boys, thugs and players. Most men in their entire lifetime could probably count their previous sex partners on one hand, and some men through no fault of their own (they may be ugly,shy etc), have never had a relationship with a woman.

Just because men like me are not successful with women, it does not mean we don’t support Mens Rights. I don’t hate women, but I certainly hate the lies and double standards attached to feminism. It’s truly heartbreaking and unjust to see good men get financially and emotionally ruined by the female biased family court systems that are in place in most Western countries.

Yes, Phoenix perhaps the mens movement may never succeed, but just because a man can’t get laid or dates, it doesn’t make him any less of a man, nor does it mean that he does not wish to see justice for men.

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At 5:38 PM, Anonymous said…

If you walk into a job interview, do you actually ask for a salary commensurate with what you’re worth? If so, you probably need to re-examine your values.

You should always ask for more than what you’re worth – not the same and especially not less. Otherwise don’t be surprised if you remain the dumpee.

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At 4:24 PM, Anonymous said…

Something is wrong with angryharry.com right now.

Do any of you people know what has happened to it?

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At 6:42 PM, Christopher in Oregon said…

One of you fellows asked me how I resisted sexual temptation. There were a number of factors that kept me away from women, and no, homosexuality has never been one of them.

I was raised a devout and very strict Mormon, and in my twenties, converted to a very fundamentalist sect of the Baptist religion. You simply did NOT fornicate. The only time I had ANY sexual relations, very minor though they were, was in the gap between religions.

Plus, my parents warned me repeatedly to stay from marriage and women. Further, I have been studying STD’s since HIV first came on the scene in the early eighties, and whatever passion I felt, was cooled by thoughts of AIDS and genital warts.

I’m very pragmatic, you see.

I don’t take any real credit for my celibacy. My thinking was shaped largely by external forces, and these days Mother Nature has simply reduced my sex drive by about 99%.

I’m 46. What do you expect, eh?

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At 7:28 PM, Anonymous said…

If we do not restore the constraints on women sexuality we will soon find ourselves back in a true Matriarchy where being the biggest baddest and meanest is the only way to get laid.”

It is practically like that already. And that is survival of the fittest in sexual selection, people. It’s not pleasant. It’s a cruel numbers game.

It’s men that bear the brunt of sexual selection, not women. And the truth is, I think, there are a lot more unrefined genes among the male population than there is the female population. About 80% of women, I’d say are “A+” specimens on a genetic level. I’d say only about 30% of men fall into that category.

They say that 10% of men fuck 90% of women, and while there hasn’t been any academic study proving this (surprisingly, they seem to produce studies on everything else like tea bags), I would say that this is the case. Notwithstanding, of course, that sexual behaviour now has very little if anything to do with considerations for offspring.

It is still survival of the fittest despite that, however. Kind of “emulation” sexual selection.

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At 8:48 PM, tba said…

NOW THIS IS WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT. I like the fact that we are having a debate on an mra blog instead of it being an echo chamber.

After looking at the comments I find myself agreeing more with Chris and Phoenix.

Men organizing won’t work NOT because we men are independent (we are) and unwilling to work together (we can, otherwise civilization would never have happened)- it’s just that we men cannot control our sexual urges. When we can do that, we can do anything.

Most women CANNOT control anything except for men BECAUSE the sexual urges of men is the ONLY thing that we as men cannot control. So when a man can control his desires anything can be accomplished.

the way I see it, sex is the ONLY arena where women are logical and it is also the only arena where men are illogical.

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At 9:37 PM, Duncan Idaho said…

the way I see it, sex is the ONLY arena where women are logical and it is also the only arena where men are illogical.

Good point, and one that, as much as we men may hate to admit it, is true. Women often act irrational but seem to be capable of being as coldly calculating and as remorseless as a computer when it comes to sexual relationships.

True liberation for us men comes from stopping ourselves from sacrificing things – like friends, dignity, freedom, financial security – just to get a sniff of a vagina.

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At 11:29 PM, Julesproves said…

Well, to be honest it only takes a handful of men to bring attention to male issues, force them onto the agenda and keep them there.

That’s pretty much true of all social movements.

Without wanting to sound pompous, I will say that the issue for me is not who women choose to fuck or which woman is “nice” or which woman is a feminist bitch.

It’s about the empowerment of the millions of ordinary men without whom no SO-SIGH-ITY would be viable.

It doesn’t take universal agreement to effect change in so-sigh-ity, never has. Doesn’t require a mass movement. All it takes is –

Enough of those who are committed.

So those who might decamp when the “right woman” comes along are perfectly entitled to do so. I hope you live happily ever after for the rest of your wife.

LOL!

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At 4:05 AM, Jane said…

Duncan.. Sorry mate, I mistakenly posted under my first name,

“Kathy”

I usually post under my middle name , which is of course Jane.

Didn’t want Chris to think he had two women getting stuck into him!!

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At 5:28 AM, Anonymous said…

About 80% of women, I’d say are “A+” specimens on a genetic level. I’d say only about 30% of men fall into that category.

I cannot disagree more. Of course, most women (about 80%) think they are a “10” and that men have to be grateful to be with such goddesses. Men reinforce this believe by excessively praising women in order to get laid.

The truth is different. Most women (as for men) are not genetic A+ (you can see this in everyday life). In fact genetic level (as most human traits) falls into a gaussian distribution (a “bell curve”). When it comes to genetic level, most women are C, a few are E- and a few are A+. The same for men.

True liberation for us men comes from stopping ourselves from sacrificing things – like friends, dignity, freedom, financial security – just to get a sniff of a vagina.

Yesterday, my mother asked me whether I would married or not (I’m 37 and a bachelor, but I have had a lot of girlfriends). I told her the truth. I told her that I’m happy being alone and don’t need anybody to tell me what I have to do, because I enjoy my freedom and doing what I want. The same that Duncan says (and don’t relinquish that for a vagina – I didn’t say that but it’s what I think). My mother said that I have “too much” good sense, he he.

So, by quoting Martin Luther King, I’m free, free at last, God almighty, free at last.

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